^"Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.
 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.
 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven."  Matthew 5:14-16

 

I was trying to get Titus to bed the other night, and like most babies, when I said "Time for sleep sleep!" or "You gotta go sleepy." He responded with a close-to-tears "No." "Are you sleepy?", "No." "Wanna go in the crib?", "No." His eyes were red, he was a bit tipsy when he walked, and cranky besides. Sure signs of a very tired baby. But he refused to go to sleep. There were toys to play with, piano keys to bang on, a carpet to toddle across. Nothing could convince him of what I could see. He was tired and cranky and needed a good night's rest.
I pondered that for a while shortly after he fell asleep (finally ;-) ). Aren't we just like grumpy little babies? We are so busy running around trying to "play", trying to accomplish things, trying to get all of our work done, bear all our burdens. But God can see we are tired. he sees we need rest. He calls us to come and rest. To cast our cares upon Him. But we insist that we're not tired. We can do it. Red eyes and cranky attitudes even a tipsy walk, we insist that we can keep going. Until we totally run out of steam and crash. Instead of getting the sweet rest that He desires to give us, we fall asleep on a chair (or a bookcase =)  ) somewhere. We break down, we get frazzled. We snap. But that's not His plan for us.
We need to give it all to Jesus. Let Him bear our burdens, take our cares. Not that we should be free of responsibility, by all means no. But that we should be free of the worry, the stress. That we should find peace in leaving all in His hands. So that we can have a smile, not a long look of wear and care. =) ( compare the above photos) =D

Just A Little Pressure

All happy, merry, bounding life, so full of little joys
Of baking, working, smiles, people, baby girls and boys.
I do my job, I go to church, I pray to You every night
Then cast a thought to others too, as I shut out the light.

I read my bible 'most everyday, (skip a time or two)
I hand out tracks, I council friends, I try to talk of You.
I go to bible study, wear nice modest clothes.
Keep my prayers skyward, not a haughty nose.

Then God...why this burdening trial? Why this burning pain?
I've gone through enough now Lord. Why try me again?
I'm close enough, I've turned to You, what else do I say?
But You know the distractions that are luring me away.

So You press a gentle hand, "No daughter don't go there."
You send a little pain, to remind me that You care.
When you sense my heart go wandering, just a little tad,
You place a little trial to send me running back.

When I cry out in frustration as I whimper through my downs,
You remind me to look up at You, stop looking  at the ground.
When I run off along the shore, remove my hand from Thine,
You send a little wave of trouble to remind me I am Thine.

So Lord, I'll not complain, for I know You know my heart
You only seek to keep me close, stop wanderings at the start.
You know how much that I can bear, You bear it all for me,
So Lord, I'll stop complaining and I'll give it all to Thee.

We are so small and mortal that how can we even try to understand the workings of God? Why did He let that child die while their friends live on? Why did that murderer get away scot-free? Why are millions around the world dying and suffering? I can't answer that. No one but God can. But I  can offer hope. That if you put your trust in an all knowing all powerful God, and you realize that in the end, although it may seem horrible, anguishing now, He has a plan, He has a greater picture in mind. Like the little boy who can't understand why his daddy will let him touch the window on the door but not the window on stove, so we are sometimes. Clueless as to God's reasoning and insisting that we know best when we can't see the whole picture; can't see the outcome.
If we keep looking around at the world, at the sin, at the problems that Satan causes, and God permits for a purpose, we take our eyes off of God and quickly sink beneath the waves as Peter did in (Matt.  14:22-33). Maybe if we remember that we were created to glorify our maker, we would look at things differently. That our purpose is to please Him. To be molded into His image. Maybe He took that father home, removed your family because He wanted you to realize that He is all you really need. Or maybe He removed your job so that He could test how loyal you are to Him, get you to realize how much more important that job had become. All of those millions of children dying, are going home to be with Him. Maybe He took that child, because that would be the only time you would think about Him or yearn for comfort. I don't know.  God has all in His mighty hands. He does as He sees best. "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil..." (Jer. 29:11) I don't want to judge anyone. I don't know what you're going through. I just want to let you know that although we only see one side of our circumstances, one day, it will all be clear, and if we persevere to the end, we shall come forth as gold through the fire. Easy to say, harder to go through. I don't know why He does what He does, but for each individual, He has a plan and purpose. One day, we will know.

Todays bible study focus. "The renewing of your mind". What are you putting in your mind? Is it pure? Is it focused on God? That book that you were reading...would it be okay if Jesus peeked over your shoulder and read that last chapter? Would it be okay if He could borrow your ipod for a minute and scroll through the music? What if He undid the 'deleted history' on your laptop? Would you invite Him to the theatre with you to catch that movie? Would you let Him in on your private imaginations and thoughts? What are you feeding your mind? Is it just, honest, true, pure, or lovely? Be careful what you put in because it will come out; in your words, your actions, your character. Put in God's Word, and let Him shape your character. =)

Just thought I'd share a few more family photos. :) It struck me as funny that Titus is the only jolly face in this set of pictures!

Titus posing unknowingly beside 'his' ball.

Tom caught at a very serious moment.

Ellen caught at a very serious moment. :)

Laura in deep thought.

Joe, helping me test lighting conditions for my camera.

There were some funny ones, but  don't think he'd

 appreciate me blogging them. :D

Refocus-a random prayerful poem

Sometimes life just gets too hard,
And God I just can't go that far!
I can't bear another burden or pain,
I just want to be free again!

Free from the tears that dim my eyes,
That rise from a heart that cries,
From lashing pain that tares the soul,
God I just want to be made whole!

But selfish heart of mortal flesh,
How swift to forget my life is blest!
That You, my Savior, chose to bear,
On your shoulders every care!

You suffered sorrow, pain, and loss,
You were lashed and beaten, nailed to a cross.
All for a sinful, selfish soul,
Yet I cry, 'Lord make me whole?' !

But You, in Your love, reach down to me,
And in Your mercy, set me free.
You cleanse me, fill me, and give me life,
Lord how can I always be so blind?

So let me forget this passing sorrow,
And with joy look forward to the morrow,
And think that one day, if I press on,
'Tis Thy blessed face I'll look upon!

Struggle

A little pilgrim girl, on a journey long,
Rose to the sound of angry shouts, not the Robin's song.
She didn't feel like rising, to face another day.
To get down on her knees, to brokenly try to pray.

She lay there just a little while, pain throbbing in her heart
As she thought of how more each day, her family tore apart.
What was the use of trying, it all looked so bleak and lost,
But she got up anyway, and wearily lifted her cross.

On her knees, tears in her eyes, remembering her failures,
She begged God to please be there and ease the guilt that trailed her.
"Please let me be a comfort, a hand to help the hurting,
And show me today what you desire for my learning."

Trying to smile and be cheerful, while the tempest raged around.
Sometimes she tripped, and shed tears, as she regained her ground.
Her heart broke for those who were being hurt, who lashed out in pain.
How she longed to take there place and let the peace of God reign.

'If only this' 'I wish that', how hard to be content!
When life is bleak, heart is pained, and your energy is spent.
But God, He's there, He holds her hand, He gives her grace to stand.
For even if the whole world doesn't, she knows, He understands.


I pray God's comfort and support on all of those struggling at home. May His peace and rest find you in complete surrender to His will.  -A. M. L.

Family Photos :)

Well...just decided to put some pictures of my family on here. :) I'm thankful for each one. :)

 

Ellen and one of the adorable puppies :)

 

Did he take that picture.....himself?!

 

Sweet Timmy and 'Teedly' (Titus)

 

Emily, grudgingly posing for the camera :D

 

One of my rare pictures

 

My dear sister Heather

 

John and Lou Lou :)

 

The three eldest. (naturally I'm the shortest :D)

Some of my family :)

                                                                    Dad and Mom

 

 

                                                                               Joe

Dad and Mom again. :)

 

 

 

                                                                             Heather


I just felt like posting some pictures of my wonderful family. :) Thank God for them all, difficult as things can get sometimes, they're great!

"I keep falling in love with Him over and over and over and over again. I keep falling in love with Him over and over and over and over again. He get's sweeter and sweeter as the days go by! Oh what a love between my Lord and I, I keep falling in love with Jesus over and over and over and over again."

What a song the Lord has ringing in my heart! Praise you Jesus!

I was going through some old photos and came across these from back around two years ago. Ah! Makes me miss those long summer days!

 

                                          Above: Amber (Me), Heather, Emily ready to get
                                          out on the water

                                           So inviting!

                                           "Hit the water!" Emily, Brooke, and me
                                           enjoying the St. Lawrence.

                                            Heather's bright smile. :)

                                            Brooke on the way back home.

                                                  Time to eat! Swimming makes a person
                                             real hungry! Nothing like a riverside pizza pie!

                                          The sunset was beautiful.

Spring has sprung! Warm breezes, exilerating zephers, rainy afternoons, the smell of spring and the flush of green, buds budding, bulbs peeping, birds singing, SPRING!!!
Today was just one of those days that Jesus felt so sweet and so close. In going about the daily "grind", I found His peace and joy at every trial, every little inconveniance or tumult that I would be tempted to gripe at. He is showing me in such a wonderful way His love and mercy and compassion. How He could love such a one as me. The change He is working in this imature, shy, timid, self righteus, selfish little girl is incredable! It just goes to show how AMAZING God is. There is no life too messed up to be changed by His awsome power!

The Trade of God

 

The Trade of God

A tailor, a gardener, an artist and a writer, all sat under a tree.
Said the tailor to the gardener, "Of all of our trades, who do you suppose God would be?"
"Well," answered the gardener adjusting his hat and tightening his grasp on his hoe.
"Of course He’s a gardener, just look at the world, all the green that’s grown and sowed.
How He’s planted the trees in clusters like berries, planted ferns in their shade.
How He’s strewn seeds of the poppy, hid the bulbs of the lily, without aid of spreader or spade.
He’s cared for the cactus bloom in the desert, grown orchids in the humid jungles’ steam.
Wild berries and rice, melons and apples, He’s tended for us to glean.
He’s raised trellises of pine and oak while still green and alive,
For the wild grapes to climb and twist as they cluster on their vine.
He waters the grass with droplets of dew, and when needful, sprinkles the rain.
His burdock and chicory He strengthens to grow, though we call them ‘weed’ and ‘pain’.
On high, lofty crags He shelters the shrub, in the desert sustains the tree,
Now gentlemen I say, with all of this wonder, a gardener our God must be."

The tailor, he smiled and clipped at his thread, saying, "I know that is not so,
For needle and thread, a gardener has not, but our God doth surely know.
The blanket of the sky our God measured and cut, His cloth of meticulous weave,
Of the golden sun’s rays, and the brilliant strands of the bright and merry sunbeams.
Rainbow colors He stitched of bright blues, and greens, and scarlet orange and red.
He chose the moon as His needle and the silvery moonbeams He thrust in as His thread.
He selected trimmings and lace of the clouds that sail in a silken blue sea, 
He spread it out and gathered it in with buttonholes of His galaxy.
Buttons and sequins He chose from among His many planets and stars,
He held fast the black velvet of the night sky with buttons of Pluto and Mars.
Then He spread it out and stitched the hem with the light of the rising sun,
And at the horizon’s end, He let it set, and said, ‘My work is done.’."

Now the artist who’d been gazing afar, turned to his gentlemen friends.
"Ack! Know you not that this earth is a canvas of a painting that never ends?"
To clarify his thought and get a picture in mind he lifted his artist brush,
And measured the sky and the distant peaks with the aid of his slender thumb.
"God has swept His brush o’er the magnificent sky with blue, and white, and gold.
He dipped it down just a touch to the tips of the awesome mountains of old.
He swept over His canvas in swift, fine strokes to form the field and meadow,
Then delicately added the flowers and quail, the clumsy bear and dainty roe.
He spread wider strokes still, as over the sea He made the thrashing waves,
From sandy shore, to barren cliffs, and oceanic caves.
Then His strokes became slow, His brush grew gentle, the bristles small and fine,
As He carefully formed the faces one by one of all of mankind.
So He drew a brush over all this world from barren crag to city skyline.
So it is clear that He is an artist my friends, to have painted a world so fine."

And so they debated and disagreed until the writer lifted his head.
He had sat there quietly listening to all that had been said.
Now in a voice, quiet, yet firm, he shushed their noisome dispute,
And his hand ‘round his pen, paper on his knee, he no longer remained mute.
"Our God is like a gardener indeed, (and here the gardener smiled in glee)
For to plant the world with flower and shrub, vine and mighty tree.
Yet also like a tailor, (tailor and gardener winked at the artist in jest),
For I am certain His hands are skilled with His needle as well as with His thread,
And an artist He must be (they smiled together) for the splendid universe,
To have a painting so grand, and so fine, and wonderful as this beautiful earth."
Then he paused for a moment, lost in thought as he stared at the arching blue sky,
Then he brought down his face, leveled his gaze, and looked each man in the eye.

"But a writer also is He, for He holds the pen of time,
As over the pages of History, He carefully writes each line.
His masterful hand guides the pen to make a masterpiece,
To those who are willing to watch Him write and not to intervene.
Each of our lives is a story, each of our days a page,
When He will begin a new chapter, which of us can say?
But if He so chose to close this one, and start on something new,
Let’s not try to claw our way back, but watch what He will do.
He adds characters into our lives, intertwines the stories of some,
He alone can start another’s tale, and tell when it is done.
He writes sometimes a merry dit that makes us laugh aloud,
Other times He writes a somber writ that settles like a shroud.
Oft times it seems our tale is long a toilsome, and boring narration.
But we must tarry through those parts til the next with anticipation.
At times our story seems to run in interesting, intriguing lines,
Others with dread suspense and horrible chapters at times.
Yet He holds the pen with Mercy’s ink that runs over the page,
He alone can form the perfect work, He alone can write our way.

So gentlemen remember this, that you have no good in your hands;
Just stop struggling, hand Him the pen, and let Him take full command."

So the writer rose and put on his cap, tucked his papers under his arm,
Then with a grave bow and a nod, he left them all feeling disarmed
Soon they returned to their respectable trades, but each with a belief in his heart,
That no matter what others may say, God had the writer’s part.

                                                                    -A.M.L.

Rain. It always gives me a feeling of warmth. To sit at my desk writing, occasionally glancing out my window at the rain when it begins to come down especially hard, or blows against the sill. Staring out the window as the car weaves through dripping traffic, or glides down a country road past rolling cornfields. To take a walk and listen to the quietness as the rain falls gently around me, or stand, awestruck, below a tree as torrents pour down from the heavens. Rain. It puts one in a mellow-dramatic mood. Like now. Curled up on a couch at work, too sick to help finish the cleanup, listening to the cry of a red-wing black bird while I type, occasionally glancing out the window at the damp world. Rain. It does that to you.

　

"For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:" Isaiah 55:10

Three Kinds of Gloves

There was once a story about a man who set about to craft some gloves. The first pair he made were flannel and warm, so he gave them to his son. The second pair he made were dainty kid gloves, soft as silk. To his wife he gifted these. Then he made himself a fine pair of heavy work gloves.
The work gloves he used daily in his shop. They lost their newness swiftly over the next few weeks, but each wear mark was well worth it for all of the good accomplished by it.
The fine, silken, lady's gloves were stored in her vanity drawer amid her shawls and scarves, smelling of perfume and fragrance.  Even after a long period of time elapsed, because she rarely wore them, save on occasion to improve her outfit, or on a special event, they were still quite fine.
The child's warm mittens however, hung in the closet in the dark, quite free from use. They were kept quite new until the cold winter came and compelled them to be taken from comfort and used in the ice and snow. Quite a good deal they accomplished for their user while the winter lasted. But as soon as the warm days commenced, they once again returned to the warm comfort of the closet.

So our lives can be compared to gloves.

Who are we to be likened to? The boy's warm mitts? Are we comfortable and "hanging" with ease in life, quite content and rested? Yes, we're redeemed. Heaven bound. But what do we do for Him? We don't bother to be of service if it requires coming out of our comfort zones. But as long as we may stay there, just "chilling" we're fine. Until trials come. The "cold" sets in. Then we are compelled to seek Him. Te desire His warmth. We cry out for Him. Then we are used by Him. But as soon as the trials are past, the "warm", good old days return, we slip back into our ease. Our closed, little closet.
Or are we like the lady's tender gloves? We look good and smell good, and live good. We sit on our scented couches amid "feathers" and "fragrance" looking all the world like wonderful Christians. We go to church for appearance. We let God "use" us on the special occasion. But we're not really living for Him. We are not really dedicated to His service. We're an empty glove.
Or are we like the worn, old work glove?  We may not look fancy. We may not be comfortable all the time, but we are at peace. We let God use us day by day, daily giving in to His will. We are constantly desiring  to be filled with Him, used by Him. Molding to His hand, more and more with each passing day. We are out to accomplish His work, living up to our title. A "work" glove.

What kind of glove are you? Are you hiding away in a closet? Living a beautiful mockery? Or are you at the lowly rank of the humble work glove? 

                                                                                                                            A. M. L.

Joe

Tom

Titus

Tim

 

 

Well....at least I tried! An attempt at drawing the people I know best. My family. Or at least part of them. And these little sketches are what I have acomplished. Not the best, but at least I know I tried. :) I really enjoy drawing and I want to work harder to actually get skilled at it. Hopefully, practice will make perfect. :)

The Sweetest Little Siblings In The World

 

 

I am so thankful to God for such adorable little siblings! They are the sweetest little children in the world! Laura was so sweet to coperate for me when I took these pictures. Timothy was not so willing. As you might see in his expression. :)

Well....I was flipping through an old addition of parents magazine when I came across an interesting idea for cards. Sooo, I got inspired and decided to design my own "modern art" cards with bright, bold colors and blank objects filled with abstract "art".  The result was.......interesting. I think I prefer the flower designs better. More my taste. ;)

The sun dips low below the trees
And cold sweeps through on the chilling breeze.
The sky tints red, then golden hue
Then deepens to a chilling blue.
Shadows scurry across the snow
Faster, faster they seek to go.
The silver moon glows on the rise
As the world slowly closes it’s eyes.
It’s the end of another day long
And the night-bird sings it’s lilting song.
                              - A. M. L.

Attempt at Photography

Lately I have been doing some photography for a project I am working on, and never have I been so sure that I have a very little idea of all that goes into it. :(  I must of taken dozens of shots of the same set from dozens of angles just to be sure I got it right. Then the lighting and the................ Anyways, they look pretty good I think, but I know a lot of you young ladies (and maybe some young men) are very proficient in the feild of photography so if you happen to come across this post, please rate my pictures from 1-10, (1 awful - 10 Excellent) and comment! (Please don't be too critical, but helpful advice is always welcome :)  )

Purity's Pearl

Purity’s Pearl

God, my pearl I’ve given You,
Help my pearl stay pure and true.
Lord, that pearl keep tucked away
Untill You decide the perfect day.

Lord polish it and keep it well,
It’s our secret, I won’t tell.
Lord let it be the choicest jewel
As my heart falls beneath Your tools.

Let my heart become the chest,
And with Your grace may it be blest;
To produce a small and velvet case,
That will be my pearls special place.

With that jewel so tucked away,
My heart the chest where it will lay,
Lord I know, I understand,
I’ve put them both into Your hand.

And while I wait upon Your time,
I’ll polish that pearl most sublime,
And You, I know, will search the land,
For a godly, Christian man.

Who You will deem worthy for my pearl,
Because he too has kept his pearl.
Then with a smile You’ll give him my heart,
And gladly I and it shall part.

Then both our pearls upon silk thread,
Will be placed over our child’s head.
But joyous though that day would be,
Perhaps that’s not Your will for me.

You’d rather keep my pearl enclosed
In the petals of loves un-bloomed rose.
You’d rather take my hand in thine,
And have me know I’m wholly thine.

My pearl You’ll set within a ring
For me to wear for You my King!
Your love the only I will know,
Your way the only I will go.

You’d rather my heart be kept in Your hand,
And Lord I know, I understand!
So whatever Your will, let it be done.
I will follow whichever one.

If You should choose a partner for me,
I’ll not struggle with uncertainty.
And if You alone will keep my heart,
From that way I won’t pine to depart.

Whichever way You choose to give,
For You my God, I’ll joyfully live.
So here’s the pearl within my heart,
I’ll wait on You to keep or part

The love that rests inside of me
To give to one, or keep with Thee.
So without more words or further ado,
Until You say differently, my heart’s with You.
                               
                                       - A. L.
　

   

Lord there are days I feel so close to You and You are so real and so dear to me. I feel Your peace and Your joy and Your love in my heart and You are such a wonder to me. On those days it's easy to thank You, it's easy to live for You and to honor You to surrender. But some days, like today, I don't feel You. It seems as if You are hiding Your face from me and I can't seem to find You anywhere. I feel so alone and lost. My prayers seem to fall on deaf ears and I begin to beleive satan's lies that You don't hear or care. That I am as worthless as I feel sometimes and I can never do anything right. But Jesus; it's in those moments I need to live by fact not feeling. I need to cling to Your promises that You will never leave me nor forsake me. That I am indeed Your daughter, beloved of God. But sometimes Jesus......it's so hard to beleive. So hard to trust.

Self Acceptance

 

Self Acceptance. Now there is something I never thought that I struggled with until recently. How, why, where....I don't really know. It could of come from rejection from my biological father, or rejection from my dad, or peers, or anything, but the point is, I have an issue. My height.
Being a fourth of Philippine makes me short like a Philippine and yes....that bothers me. Also the fact that I look 12 when in reality I am 16 only adds insult to injury. But God knows my silly little preferences and decided I needed to stop my whining. Maybe one day He'll use my shortness for something or maybe I can minister to other "shorties" with sympathy, :) But either case, He decided to send me a word of rebuke at Ephrata Missions Conference last week.
One of the speakers there, told a story about a silly little woman who came to him in tears over her height (or lack thereof). When I heard the story, I laughed with the rest, though from the laughing glances I got from my sister and friends, I realised that I was just as silly. I don't think I'd ever go crying to a pastor, but I do complain a LOT about the "inconvenience" of being so short and "baby-faced".
I need to learn to accept the fact that God gave me my height and my appearance and I ought to be thankful to Him that I am healthy and redeemed and His daughter. It doesn't matter if I'm not tall and "beautiful" in others eyes, because I am beautiful to Him. Who cares if my nose is round and my face is round, and I am round. It's not how I look, it's how I am. Am I a godly young lady who is serving God in purity and humility, a true handmaiden of the Lord? Am I showing His love to others and reaching out of my "comfort zone"? Am I beautiful by HIS standards?
The outward appearance is NOT to be top priority, because if it is, it becomes so easy to stop accepting yourself for who God made you to be, and to start trying to become who you are not.
And that is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. Rather, I want to push toward the mark, developing inward beauty, and winning souls for Him along the way. To become a perfect work of righteousness and beauty in Him. May I by His grace overcome.   -A. M. L.